14 minute listen
What is the Inner Child?
The inner child is the part of you that remembers what it feels like to be in the light, a piece of God, the Divine. The inner child remembers what it feels like to be unconditionally loved, to express unbridled joy, to be playful, curious, creative, to be free, to be wholly present. The inner child has an intimacy with its pure essence, with being, that can not be described with mere words.
What is Intimacy?
Intimacy is the opening of your heart, all aspects of you, in all its expressions, with honestly, transparency, authenticity, compassion, and without judgement.
Intimacy is the key to experiencing life.
Through intimacy, beauty is revealed in all things.
We slow down, we notice, we see, we hear, we smell, we touch, we sense.
We are completely one with each experience in the moment we are experiencing it.
This is what it feels like to be alive in these bodies, in this material world.
Through intimacy, our hearts are open to experience the depth of pleasure and joy,
as well as depth in their polar opposites - pain and sorrow.
This is the human experience.
You can not have one without the other.
And pain hurts.
We want to avoid it at all costs.
When we avoid pain, we limit ourselves in experiencing the depth of life.
What is Pain?
There are two types of pain - physical pain and emotional pain. Physical Pain is the unpleasant sensory and experience associated with actual or potential damage to the physical body. Emotional pain is a non-physical feeling of distress or suffering that stems from adverse experiences or circumstances.
While we are designed to feel and avoid physical pain, emotional pain is different.
It will not harm us, it will not kill us.
Yet, the mind does not know the difference between physical pain and emotional pain. It just wants to avoid pain. When we avoid emotional pain, we limit our capacity of intimacy.
And without intimacy, life lacks luster, it lacks color richness, depth and joy. We deny ourselves the joy of being alive in these bodies. We deny ourselves the experience of beauty right in front of us in all of its forms.
We move through this life numb.
We miss out on what it means to be alive.
We move through this human experience feeling disconnected, always searching for something external to fill the emptiness inside,
We miss connection.
What holds us back in experiencing true intimate connections?
Facing and feeling our emotional pain.
We close ourselves off to avoid experiencing pain, we also then close ourselves off to experiencing joy and beauty, the other side of this emotional frequency spectrum.
By allowing ourselves to go into the depths of emotional pain, we also allow ourselves to experience the depth of joy that intimacy brings.
Intimacy requires courage, the moral fiber to accept the possibility of pain, heartache and heartbreak in any and all circumstances.
Without courage, we become too weak, too scared, too fragile to accept the possibility and perhaps the inevitability of heartache, heartbreak, pain. We limit our experience and cannot begin to notice, to relish in, the joys of what it means to be human. We do not experience deep, real, intimate relationships…with ourselves, with others, with all sentient beings, and with nature
Well know this - You are not fragile.
You have the courage to go to the depths across the entire emotional spectrum.
You are powerful beyond your imagination!
What is trauma?
Creating intimacy in our lives begins with healing the wounded child within.
That requires having courage to revisit earlier childhood trauma in order to process the emotional pain.
The childhood wound begins with trauma. We all experience trauma. It is simply part of this human experience.
Trauma is any event, conversation or situation that distanced you from you,
your self worth. the piece of God within you, that fragment of the Universe that is your essence. (Karen Curry Parker, Quantum Human Design)
And Trauma is not the culprit here. Trauma is simply the energetic fodder for our souls’ development in these bodies along our journeys in this material plane.
IT IS the unprocessed emotional energy FROM the trauma that is problematic.
Unprocessed emotions get trapped in the body and are reinforced by the mind’s story.
When we will do anything to avoid the pain, we also cut ourselves off of intimacy.
It is just too painful get that close. The pain is too great to face. This adaptive strategy simply further’s the distance between you, your inner higher self and your inner child.
The Human Condition
As children we do not have the innate understanding nor do we have consistent external role models teaching us how to process and transcend emotional energy appropriately,
Through external conditioning, we learn to stuff it, escape from it or create destructive adaptive strategies to unleash it. Unless, of course, we were born into a family and exposed to environments with consistent demonstrations of highly emotional intelligent practices.
As we enter adulthood, we discover that we have a choice. We can continue living out unconscious destructive patterns of behavior that no longer serve us OR we can choose to parent ourselves anew through self discovery, self acceptance and self love.
Committing with courage all the way by practicing gentleness, compassion and patience, towards ourselves and others.
How do I reconnect with my Child Within?
First understand that your wounded inner child, the fragmented part of yourself, is hiding somewhere in the recesses of the subconscious mind, feeling abandoned and alone, unable to come out because they do not feel safe with you. This has to do with a continued pattern of self-betraying behavior that pushed them away, starting with the first childhood trauma.
Each time we self-betray ourselves, we disconnect unintentionally, unconsciously with our inner child.
This fragmented part of you wants to feel safe with you, but it will take time take time for you to re-establish trust in order for your inner child to feel safe and welcomed by you again.
Be patient. To earn your inner child’s trust again, contemplate the following questions:
Can I accept and love myself unconditionally? Can I honor me, cherish me, BE me?
Whatever practices or modalities you choose to incorporate into your life to arrive to this space of inner peace, self love and acceptance, it does not matter. It is the intention,
Ahhh, and that once you create this inner space of pure unconditional self love, your inner child is sure to gravitate towards your inner warmth with little to no coaxing.
A Visualization Practice - using the mind appropriately
The following exercise is a good use of the mind. This is not about dwelling on the past. This is not about rehashing details of a old wounding experiences. This IS about allowing ourselves to FEEL what the younger version of ourselves felt at the time of wounding and help them process and transcend the past emotional energy.
This is about reconnecting to the abandoned parts of us with love, compassion, forgiveness, optimism, courage and openness.
Seize the opportunity as it happens. The moment you recognize an inner dialogue that belittles, limits or dis-empowers you, this is the moment to pause and contemplate on the root of that thought pattern. Notice how it feels in the body.
Allow yourself to go back to an early childhood wounding, that moment in time that was the beginning of the thought pattern and when you abandoned you in order to survive a situation.
May you find this and other Reveal audios helpful as you discover the marvelous miracle of what it means to be you.
Please refer to this GUIDED VISUALIZATION audio for a guided visualization practice on reconnecting with your inner child.
To understand the Human Condition, please visit this post:
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